How can i set boundaries with a friend who constantly vents to me?

[AndrewM]

I’ve been trying to set better boundaries with a close friend who constantly vents to me for hours, but I feel guilty every time I say I’m not in the headspace to listen. I worry that protecting my own energy makes me a bad friend, even though I know I’m getting drained.

[AddisonP]

I tried saying we could talk for twenty minutes and then switch to something lighter. It helped a little, but I still felt wrong when the timer rang and he sounded disappointed.

[Luna.W]

Guilt is real for me too. I worry that protecting my own energy by setting boundaries makes me a bad friend, even though I crash after long vent sessions.

[Aaron_W]

Maybe the problem is bigger than the hours of venting. I wonder if I keep tying my self worth to being the ear that never runs out, and that just hides other stuff we could fix.

[Brian43]

I tried jotting a quick note to vent into for myself when I feel drained and then slipping into another topic with him, but I forgot to use it more than once.