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How do I handle a forum user who pushes civility rules too far?
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How do I handle a forum user who pushes civility rules too far?
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I’m a new moderator on a small hobby forum, and I’m struggling with how to handle a user who constantly pushes the boundaries of our civility rule without quite breaking it. The other mods think we should just let it go, but it feels like it’s creating a tense atmosphere. I’m not sure where that line between strict and reasonable community management really is.
I started by jotting down the exact moments when the tone went off and tried a soft reminder rather than a full takedown it kept things warmer for a bit but the pattern came back
Some days I feel like we are policing a vibe more than a rule and that makes me unsure if we should act or not
We posted a light etiquette note and asked people to cite concrete issues not personal digs it felt odd at first but it did lower the heat a notch and it kept civility in view
I tried a longer timeout once and the thread died for a while then came back with the same insults in different packaging I dropped that approach
I keep notes on what actually triggers counting as pushing too far and whether the group flags it or not the data point is messy but it helps me decide to intervene
Do you think the line you draw is really about the rule or about what users feel in the moment
Sometimes I drift to other forums and see how they handle the same thing and I end up more confused about what the real issue is and I cant settle on a plan
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