Should I move our group chat to direct messages without ruining the vibe?

[ScarlettJ]

I work with couples on setting and achieving relationship goals, and I've found that having shared goals can really strengthen a relationship. But not all goals are created equal - some bring couples together while others create pressure.

Some relationship goals advice I often give: focus on process goals (how you want to treat each other) rather than just outcome goals (where you want to be in 5 years), make sure goals are mutually agreed upon rather than imposed by one person, and celebrate small progress along the way.

What relationship goals advice have you found helpful? I'm interested in how couples can set goals that actually bring them closer rather than creating stress.

[VioletT]

I’ve been talking to someone in a group chat for months and we really click, but I’m worried asking to move to direct messages might change the easygoing dynamic we have now. It feels like a big step even though it’s just a different chat window.

[Abigail42]

I did move from a group chat to direct messages once and it felt kind of brave but the vibe stayed the same for a while.

[William44]

I was worried too and nothing changed right away but then the group chat kept that easy tempo so I kept delaying.

[Mark47]

I tried sending a casual hello in private and it did shift the pace a bit but it opened space for different topics.

[SavannahJM]

Maybe the real thing is whether you actually want a deeper convo or you just want to feel seen by them in a smaller space.

[RobertUS]

Do you think you would enjoy a quick one on one check in or does the group feel safer?

[AriaXL]

Sometimes I drifted to other chats and forgot about the group for a bit before coming back.